How To Make Your Beard Soft

When growing a beard, it can feel both coarse and rough – this can be a problem especially when getting intimate with your significant other.

Below we are going to share what causes a dry beard along with a suggested grooming routine that will get your beard measurably softer.

Let’s take a look:

What Causes a Dry (Crunchy) Beard

Dry or crunchy feeling beards are caused by a lack of moisture and nourishment.  This is particularly prevalent during the dry winter months; a time when most men grow out their beards.

Longer beards require proper care.  This includes cleansing the facial hair every other day with a natural beard shampoo.  Additionally, a supplementary conditioner such as beard oil or beard balm should be applied daily.

3 Step Grooming Routine to a Softer Beard

Resolving a dry beard is fairly straightforward.  Follow the steps below for effective results:

1. Cleaning Your Beard

Wash your beard once every two days.  We recommend that you go with a natural beard wash or shampoo.  A natural beard wash will remove all the dirt and debris from your beard while nourishing the facial hair and skin.

In lieu of a beard wash, a natural bar of soap or shampoo can suffice. Using a mass-produced chemical-heavy soap or shampoo with continued use may cause dryness as it will strip away the necessary oils for your skin and facial hair.

2. Select a Conditioner

A beard can be conditioned regularly through a variety of beard care products.  The two most popular are beard balm and beard oil as we discuss in detail here.  Other products include beard cream, beard jelly, beard lotion, etc. these are all essentially the same.

Well-made conditioners rely on carrier oils and essential oils.  Additionally, thicker conditioners such as balms rely on beeswax and butter for more effective results.

Beard conditioners should be applied daily; ideally in the morning.  When applying, a beard conditioner should be worked not only into the entire length of your beard but the skin beneath your beard as well.

Daily application of a beard conditioner will soften your beard considerably.  

The quantity used for each conditioner depends on the length of your beard.  Roughly a thumbnail-sized amount for a beard balm and a dime-sized amount for beard oil.  Adjust accordingly.

Lastly, discontinue heavy use of a beard conditioner if your beard appears greasy or matted.  Simply wash your beard thoroughly and take a couple of days off before reapplication.

3. Brushing Your Beard

Brush instead of combing your beard.  A natural or animal bristle beard brush will help to spread the beard conditioner along the entire length of your facial hair.  Brushing once or twice daily will help to soften your beard by keeping it well-conditioned.

Beard combs are rigid and are intended for styling purposes only.  If you must, use a beard comb after your beard has been conditioned and brushed thoroughly.

A Few Questions About Softening Facial Hair

I use beard oil and beard wash every day yet sometimes my beard seems to be a bit rough why is that?

Try being a bit more liberal with the conditioner application, especially if the humidity is quite low.  Additionally, you can always apply a beard conditioner throughout the day or before bed.

Is it ok to use beard oil if you have acne underneath your beard?

Generally, yes.  If it’s your first time using beard oil, consider one that relies on jojoba oil.  Jojoba oil is mild and compatible with most skin types.  Always discuss with your dermatologist if you have further questions.

My significant other says my beard hurts when we kiss, what can I do?

If it feels spikey, then perhaps it’s just a question of length, especially if you just started growing out your beard.  After a month of growth, the hairs should feel softer and not as rigid as a dense stubble.

Are there any DIY remedies to soften a beard?

Beard oil is a very simple conditioner primarily consisting of carrier and essential oils.  Here’s a guide on how to make beard oil.  The guide also includes a few beard oil recipes to get you started.

How to soften my beard for shaving?

If you were looking to just make your beard a bit softer for shaving, read our guide on how to get a close comfortable shave.  There we discuss a few tips for softer facial hair when shaving.

Adam Williams

As the lead editor of Tools of Men, Adam loves men's grooming products. Particularly of interest is managing facial hair and perfecting the art of the modern man's skincare routine. His work has been featured or quoted in several publications, including New York Magazine, Vice, Sharpologist, MIC, Elite Daily, and more. When Adam isn't working, he enjoys spending time with his two little kids who keep him both on his toes and young at heart.

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